Welcome to whatever is on my mind!

Some people use the term "nonsense" but I prefer to use the phrase "uncommonly sensed" because it's more reflective of creative types.

Friday, July 27, 2012

A Lesson in Trees

Nirvana said that Mother Nature is a whore. They were wrong. She’s a pimp and the Bradford Pear is a whore among trees, as I have written in my previous post located here. I’ve accumulated some additional evidence from a recent storm to help illustrate my point.

This is what happens when Mother Nature the Pimp helps you spread your pollen and you don’t pay her back:

Here’s what happens when Mother Nature sends squirrels and other desperate animals your way and you don’t give her a cut of the nuts stored in your trunk:

And here’s what happens when you allow regular customers (such as birds) to dwell in your branches for free:



Don’t mess with a pimp or she will mess you up.

Some people think that pine trees are whores because they’re weak trees. Not the same thing. When you plant a young pine sapling, it shoots up as fast as it can. This makes them the crack junkies of the tree world.

This is what happens when a crack junkie shoots up too quickly:


Pine trees are junkies and their habit of shooting up can really mess up your yard.


  1. Wow, and people say they're afraid of how MY brain works!

    1. I'm glad to be of service as a benchmark! :)

  2. I love this post. You hit it the nail on the head.

  3. Great post Amy...This proves you better not mess with that Mother pimping whore.

  4. LOL! I love the lesson- and it's true, don't mess with mother nature, she can really put a damper on your day : ) ~ Jess

  5. I love your humor. Here in Tennessee I have found that all trees have shallow roots so don't park or sit under them. Limbs fall all the time and any little wind knocks them over. New follower from BSN July blog hop.

  6. I have one of those hollowed out trees that the squirrels nest inside. It still looks green and healthy but now I'm wondering...