Life Lessons From The Drum Show

 This past weekend I attended the Nashville Drum Show. If I had to describe this event in one word, it would be LOUD. Imagine a room with a cement floor, cinder block walls, tin roof, and hundreds of drums and drummers. Even the sales reps were wearing earplugs.

It was difficult to talk during the show, but I did see some very nice things. Check out the beautiful work on the drums in the photos in this post.

However, no matter how beautiful the drum is, what matters most is the sound and it was difficult to hear anything clearly amid all the noise.  It’s like trying to hear a conversation when there are a few hundred people shouting around you.

My husband and I talked when we left the show. He’s worked with a lot of drummers and he said that he’s found that some of them just hit as hard as they can and let the producer set the levels in the recordings (or sound guy in a live situation). Other drummers play according to the situation and adjust their volume to the size of the room, type of event, genre of music, and the people they’re playing with. In other words, some drummers pretty much do one thing: they’re very solid, lay down the beat, and let someone else make it fit. Other drummers are more collaborative in their approach and see making music as a team effort.

I think I’ve come across people who approach life from each of these perspectives, also. The ones who hit hard and let others sort it out have the ability to drive the song, but they also tend to leave a lot of broken pieces behind. The ones who adapt to the situation and adjust their playing accordingly have more friends. I don’t know if one approach is more valuable than the other, although I know which one I prefer. I know that sometimes what we need is a strong beat to help us keep going, but most of the time what we need are people who can work with us as collaborators. Those are the situations where life is most beautiful.

How to Get The Attention of Your Teenager

I hear a lot of parents complaining that they can’t get their teenager’s attention.  It’s really a simple task. However, like anything with kids, you need to approach it in the correct manner.  I’m going to give you a few tips and you can use as many or as few as you like.

Tip One
Pick up a book you’ve been dying to read and look interested in it.  It seems obvious because it is - nothing draws your kids faster than the appearance that you may actually be enjoying yourself. Of course, this technique has resulted in some injuries as kids have resorted to attacking one another in order to punish you for taking time for yourself. They know that nothing gets your attention faster than their fights. Thus, this technique is occasionally too effective.

 Tip Two
Wear something completely age inappropriate and revealing.  Short shorts, a halter top, and high heels are particularly effective in getting your kids to pay attention to you. It works even better if you’re a man.  Do this in public and talk loudly with a bad accent that shifts from one ethnicity to another. Bonus points if you do this in front of people they know.


Tip Three
Bake something.  It’s the smell that draws them, so you might want to simply purchase a scented candle that smells like freshly baked cookies and then just sit back and wait in the kitchen until the kids show up.  Note that this will draw them, but when the food proves to be bogus, they’ll try to run away.  If the food does exist, they’ll attempt to take the food and then run away with it. Thus, you may want to have a restraining device handy for when they arrive on the scene.


Tip Four
If you're out in public, randomly choose strangers to point at and loudly say, "Isn't that the boy (or girl) you like?" This will usually cause the child to become withdrawn and quiet. Then you can finally read that book you were trying to read in Tip One.

Feel free to embellish these to “make them your own.” And, of course, please post pictures and/or video online for the rest of us to enjoy. Happy parenting!

An Excerpt From My Conversation with John

Last week I met John Ford Coley at a party and really enjoyed talking with him. John is an interesting guy who told me that he gives two pieces of advice to musicians who are new to Nashville. The things he said could be beneficial to a person in just about any industry, so I thought I would share them here.

He said that there are basically two rules that you need to follow. My apologies to John for not remembering his exact wording, but here’s the general sense of what he said to me:

1. Don’t say anything negative about anyone else.
You might think that you’re “safe” talking about someone behind their back, but these things have a way of coming back on you. The person you’re talking with might even agree with you or might not have contact with the person you’re talking about, but it’s very likely that the person you talked to will talk to someone else. Nashville really is a small town and word gets around. Even if you work in a larger city, most professions have small communities and if you badmouth one of the members of that community it’s likely to get back to the person or to someone who knows the person. If you talk negatively about other people you may be burning bridges you didn’t know existed because eventually no one wants to talk with you.

2. Don’t get upset if someone less qualified or less talented gets a job that you thought you deserved.
This is a difficult one because in just about any profession you’ll see hacks making a lot of money doing poor quality work while more talented individuals get ignored. However, griping doesn’t change the situation and only makes you look bad. You may not like the work that someone else is doing, but calling attention to that person’s deficits will only make you bitter and appear less attractive to work with. Let it go and realize that your time will come. We can’t all be successful at the same time or in the same way, so be glad for someone else when their star shines. Eventually it will be your turn and hopefully others will be just as gracious with you.

John has a lot of maturity and wisdom. He knows that it takes more than talent to make it in any industry - it also takes being the sort of person that other people want to be around. Take the time to develop your skills, but also develop your character because even the best qualified people can't be successful alone.